The Buck Stops Here

The hubbub erupting from a small corner of Packer world this morning is that Brett Favre will be on the premiere of Joe Buck Live tonight at 8 pm on HBO. I can’t imagine watching Joe Buck for an hour, and it becomes even more nauseating to think that, in addition to Buck, you would also have to listen to Favre for an hour. HBO and Joe Buck have another problem. The problem being: Joe Buck’s show, and Favre’s (presumed) “feel sorry for me” interview, goes up against something on HBO’s own family of networks that will ensure no one watches it.

Ladies and gentlemen, the last hour of the 8th greatest Western of all time is playing on Cinemax East from 8:00-9:00. See if this rings any bells: “Regulators! Mount up” Nope, not the Warren G song, it’s this. Yep, good luck Joe and Brett, you’re up against Young Guns. With Emilio Estevez, Keifer Sutherland, Lou Diamond Philips, and Charlie Sheen, not to mention to Jack Palance as the nemesis, you aren’t coming out on top no matter how big of a “gunslinger” (couldn't resist) you are. It’s a shame HBO is setting Joe Buck up for this immediate failure, I would have liked to have seen it be more drawn out.

You’re still thinking that you’d rather watch the Favre interview, complete with requisite excuses for retire, un-retire, retire, un-retire? Maybe I need to refresh your memory about the ending of the movie. It is a classic Western setup with the protagonists holed up in a house and surrounded by their enemies, in this case the U.S. Calvary, bounty hunters, various lawmen, and an angry Jack Palance. If this wasn’t enough to get you excited, here’s a quote from William H. Bonney leading up to the final confrontation (which turns out to be bloody and over-the-top. Nice.)

“Hey, Peppin. I see you got Charley Crawford down there with you.”
“Yeah, that's right, Bonney. We got a whole..”
[Billy the Kid shoots Charley Crawford]
“Hey, Peppin. Charley Crawford's not with you anymore.”

Simple and funny, yet incredibly intimidating.

You know the rest, escaping the burning house in a trunk, slow-motion gunplay and screaming, and finally Emilio Estevez’ amazing shot from up on a horse, right between Jack Palance’s eyes from about 50 yards away. You now have the Ranter’s permission to go search YouTube for any and all, Young Guns clips, I’m not so naïve as to believe you have not done so already.

Enjoy, the movie tonight.... wait, you’re still trying to figure out the top 7 Westerns of all time aren’t you?

Update: Franklin's Top 7 Westerns of all time

1. The Searchers (aka The Lions looking for a win)
2. The Good, The Bad and the Ugly (aka The Packers, The Vikings, and the Bears)
3. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (aka Aaron Rodgers and Greg Jennings)
4. The Magnificent Seven (aka The Packers Front Seven)
5. Unforgiven (aka Brett Favre on the Vikes)
6. Rio Bravo
7. Tombstone (aka Cutler's Future in Chicago)