Need Green Bay Lodging on the Cheap?

Robert and I noticed there was some anger and disappointment following the release of the 2011 Packers schedule. This anger stems from Packer fans being subjected to overpriced accommodations while staying in Green Bay during game weekends. This price increase would be justified if the level of services and amenities were raised, but I have my doubts that the Motel 6 will not only leave the light on for you, but they will stock your mini-fridge with Spotted Cow, fresh cheese curds, and beef sticks, and also provide you with a limo ride to 1265 complete with champagne and bratwurst. It's gotten to be somewhat out of control. Most fans, myself included, can't drop a mortgage payment on two nights in a lumpy bed. Therefore, Robert and I have put together a short review of a hotel... ummm... motel... ummm...building where we stayed one year. We believed that the savings accommodation would allow for our limited funds to be used on food, drink, and petrol, which they did. So, if your liquid assets are dwindling, you might consider Green Bay's Economy Inn. Might being the operative word.

Looking for an alternative to the price-gouging done by chain hotels during Packer game day weekends? Look no further than the $40 a night Economy Inn of Green Bay. Who knows what kind of exciting people you'll meet during your stay? Drug dealers, women of the night, criminals and generally seedy characters of all kinds lurk and loom in the dimly lit hallways, traveling in and out of their rooms like drunken worker bees at all hours of the night.

The rooms have an interesting design scheme with lime green painted cinder-block walls, mismatched bedspreads, and shadeless lamps. The smell of stale cigarettes, sweat, and and cheap booze permeates the room (and your clothes when you leave). The bathroom, while not dirty, wasn't exactly clean, but according to Robert, it was spacious and offered plenty of room to kneel and even lay down!

For those time-crunched and celebration weary travelers, checking in and out is a breeze. Sure you may have to scribble a signature when you arrive, but at the Economy Inn, identification is not required. In the morning, simply hand off two Andrew Jacksons on your way to your car (provided it's still there) without any questions asked, despite whatever loud, ominous screams that may or may not have been reverberating the hallways the night before.

Other $40 motels just cannot match the total hospitality package that includes a key, gravel parking lot, fecal smell and general feeling of being robbed at knifepoint at any time. Oh, and if you have anything you may not want anymore, a camera, CDs, a half empty case of beer, just leave it in your car, it's sure to be gone in the morning.

Hope this review helps when you are weighing your lodging options in Green Bay. We're not convinced it will, as most of our readers seem to have a slightly more advanced level of common sense then we do, but oh well. Go Pack!

Best of the Ranter so Far

Franklin and I have been Ranting since Rodgers took over in Green Bay. I put together some of the highlights from those last 3+ years. For those that have followed us, I hope this brings back some memory LOLs. For those new to us, maybe this will make you want to go check out some of our previous Rants. In either case, enjoy!

This video is also posted on Youtube here.

Jayme Lee Family Photo

Along with a gently used flannel and a sweet collectible mug, I recently purchased this photo at a thrift store in Milwaukee for $5 plus tax. I bought it because it reminded me of one of my favorite 80s bands, Journey. Man, they were SO HOT for a while and I’ve always said if you haven’t air-drummed to Don’t Stop Believin’, you haven’t lived.

As I was mounting the picture in my garage above the weight bench and next to the boom box, something strange happened. The more I looked at it, the picture reminded me of my Uncle Chichi and his family. But the even MORE I looked at it, I realized it resembled Packers’ blogger Jayme Joers. And not just the picture in the middle with the subtle yet prevalent chest hair, either. In fact, the whole family looked like her! I said to myself, “Hey self, you have to post this and get a 2nd opinion.”

In all seriousness, if you follow her on Twitter (@jaymelee1), you may have noticed Jayme's had about 5 million blood draws recently. While probably not that painful in itself, I got the impression she was getting drained (no pun intended) and frustrated. Since she’s such a nice lady and friendly neighbor of ours, I was hoping this picture might cheer her up. As I told her, I made it for one simple reason: to give her a LOL. While I failed to complete this goal, I am happy to say she gave it a “HA HA HA HA HA HA” instead. Cheers, Jayme.

New At The Pro Shop: Lambeau Field Lockout Kraut

I don't feel sorry for anyone in this lockout other than the staff of the Packers. Staff who, while they have not yet, may be forced to take an involuntary pay cut, or if things drag on, a vacation. Personally, I think that's unacceptable. I love days off and vacations as much as the next big, fat, party animal, but forced vacations are just not cool. This is even more true when the cause of the forced all-day happy hour is because two sides can't sit down and negotiate like adults.

In order to protect these hardworking folks who make the Green Bay Packers run like the Super Bowl winning machine they are from losing their livelihood, I have come up with a moneymaking scheme. A scheme so simplistic, you'd think someone would have thought of it already, especially someone on the grounds crew. In the absence of training camp and possibly a portion of the season, I suggest planting row upon row of cabbage on the practice fields and Lambeau itself and when the crop is ready, making Lambeau Field Lockout Kraut. I can't think of a better way to create a source of funds for staff payroll in the absence of football. People will flock from regions far and wide to get a tour of the cabbage crops and the pickling room (I suggest the visitors' lockerroom, as the smell will linger long after the lockout has ended). Following the tours, people will clamor for a bratwurst condiment grown and produced at the home of the Packers.

I personally plan on buying two giant tubs and mounding this delectable pickled cabbage product on the first brat I eat when celebrating the eventual start of football...whenever that may be. I can also feel proud of myself that I am helping out the good folks who work at 1265 Lambeau.

Remember, it's important to not only support the team, but to support the whole Packer family.